Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Traveling Toward Everywhere

I was on a 6 hour flight from Charlotte to San Francisco last night after a 4 hour layover and a 2 hour delay....

During the flight I was reading a book that was given to me by one of my best friends called; Riding Toward Everywhere by Williamt T Vollman. The book is about himself and his companion Steve taking to the rails on freight cars. Questioning anything and everything subjecting both our national romance and our skepticism about hobo life and the reality of what he actually sees.

I read two things in this book that stuck with me. One had to do with an old man and his life on the train. What kept him going was the freedom of it. Upon reflection, it brought him to tears because it is such a sharp contrast to his own current life now which is completely organized. The second, when you travel, whatever mode of transportation you are in, it takes you places you would have never seen otherwise from different views. You then start to analyze; "Where exactly am I going? What am I doing?" Where is "Everywhere?"

In the airport, I heard people bitching left and right... and to be honest I wasnt exactly happy about the scenario but would I trade it for anything else? Absolutely not. It's part of my life I have grown to enjoy and appreciate. Its always different everyday and there's always a story to tell.

Then it hits you... the journey is the real gem here. Everywhere, is getting there.

Taken with my phone in the bathroom stall of an airport

Friday, January 22, 2010


I called a friend of mine while driving to New York and thinking - as per usual. I had this epiphany to what it took for relationships to work. People have a misconception that as long as you are in lust or care about a person it will work... it doesnt work that way.

The Four Loves -4 Greek words that mean love, I had the conversation about three of them. The other is storge (pronounced STORE-gay) which is the Greek word for "natural affection" which is really unconditional love.

Eros - which means passion, fire, physical attraction, romance.

Phileo - which means friendship but also more than friendship. Phileo is the word behind Philadelphia, the "City of Brotherly Love". Phileo is a deep and abiding affection for another person. Phileo means taking delight in being in the presence of the other, as in "I love to be with you". Phileo is like slipping into a favorite set of old clothes that feels very comfortable, except that you are slipping into a very comfortable relationship.

Agape - a long term commitment to another person. Agape says "I will treat you like I love you even when I don't feel like I love you". Agape is what keeps one person loyal to another during the more stressful times in a relationship. Agape treats another person well, even if they aren't treating you well in return.

Ideally, a couple would have all three all of the time. Realistically, eros and phileo can fade from time to time. There are difficult times in which we just don't enjoy being with the other person. Or we are in no mood to be passionate. We don't feel romantic. Agape is the glue that holds a relationship together when eros and/or phileo are at low tide.

A lot of couples who have been together a long time (for decades rather than for years) would say that it is easier to live without eros for a while, than to live without phileo for a while.

All that is all with timing and understand as with anything else....

Hey this is the philosophy of a nude model.. well more like epiphanies that I have and then realize they have already been coined by people smarter than I.

Monday, January 11, 2010

The Cure

Not the band...

I was sent an article this morning that made me think, again. http://www.technologyreview.com/biomedicine/24325/

"I think that fragile X-targeted treatments are at the cutting edge of reversing cognitive deficits in individuals with neurodevelopmental disorders," says Randi Hagerman, medical director of the M.I.N.D. Institute at the University of California, Davis. Hagerman consults with a number of companies, including Seaside, that are developing treatments for fragile X syndrome. "This could lead to reversing intellectual disabilities and behavioral problems with this disorder," she says. "That is extremely exciting."

The fragile X mutation blocks production of a protein called FMRP (fragile X mental retardation protein), whose normal task is to inhibit molecular activity at the connections between nerve cells. Loss of the protein appears to throws the system out of whack. "It's like driving a car with your foot on the accelerator and no brake," says Randall Carpenter, a physician and cofounder of Seaside. "There is too much activation of that pathway."

I read something on the BBC a year or so ago that scientists had reversed the syndrome in lab mice. I'm reading this and crying. This is a very real possibility. It could be 15-20 years before the drug is marketed and available...

Which means I have a lot of thinking and decision making to do.

A lot.

On another note;

It's official, im a published photographer. That makes me feel pretty amazing and pushes me even more to publish a book on Aidan.